Hungry Eyes
by Sailor Seraphim
Summary: Just what is love anyway? Is it your words? Your actions? Or is it a combination of both...? Duo finds the answer he wants. Some implied yaoi (2x1)


Title: Hungry Eyes (1/1)  
Author: Sailor Seraphim (slrsera @ aol.com)  
Archive:   
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All others please ask.  
Rating:  
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing or any of its related characters. If I did, the series would be chock-full of tasty shounen ai goodness. I also do not own the song "Hungry Eyes," Eric Carmen does, and probably the people who made the movie "Dirty Dancing." I do, however, own the situations which occur in this fic.  
Pairings: 2x1 implied (Look, Ma! I put Duo on top!)  
Warnings: angst, shounen ai-ish, OOC?, dramatic imagery, TWT?, blood, death, sex???, gore, knives, blood, did I mention the death? Oh... and a sappy love song from the 80s.  
Spoilers: general series knowledge. Also, spoilers for Duo's past in Episode Zero and Endless Waltz.  
Notes: Well, yet another songfic from F*cked Up Fanfic Productions. This bunny just attacked me and it was *disturbing.* Quite possibly because I had a massive 80s flashback when I heard this song. Apparently music from the 80s and plotbunnies don't mix. Or they mix and you get songfics like this one. There is no excuse for this fic. In fact, you probably shouldn't even read it. This is your only chance to leave before you're scarred for life.  
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blah = lyrics  
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Feedback: I take all constructive criticism. No flames, they leave nasty scorch marks on the carpet.  
  
  
  
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His breath was rough and heavy in his throat, threatening to choke him. He couldn't help but pant in anticipation of the act that would come soon... so soon... not soon enough. Goddamn, he was already hot and bothered and he'd barely even started. Duo supposed it was true. The chase was the best part of the game. Then his eyes caught sight of his prey, Duo licked his lips, and he pushed himself through the crowd.  
  
Well, maybe not the *best* part.  
  
  
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I've been meaning to tell you   
I've got this feelin' that won't subside   
I look at you and I fantasize   
You're mine tonight   
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Violet eyes glittered in the darkness, tracking the man's movements through the crowd.  
  
It was like play, like a game. It always started the same way. It always ended the same way. But it was what happened in the middle that was intoxicating. Duo wondered if maybe -- just maybe -- he wasn't addicted. But if this was an addiction, he didn't want a cure. He wanted more of it. He craved it. He felt the roaring swell of emotions in his chest and went with them.  
  
There was a meeting of their eyes. A subtle invitation. Sent. Received. And now Duo found himself watching pair of broad shoulders as they worked their way through the crowd. He followed his prey out into the dark night, the pulsing thump and beat of bass and electronics dogging every step he took.  
  
  
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Now I've got you in my sights   
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Duo thrust again, panting hard, biting his lip until it bled to smother his moans. Always... it always felt like this. It felt like this before, and Duo couldn't help but long for this sinful ecstasy. He thrust even harder, ignoring the pained and muffled cries of the man beneath him. Felt so good. Too bad he couldn't do more. Then the body beneath him stiffened, his cries smothered behind the gag and Duo cried out as well, joining him.  
  
Well, not exactly joining.  
  
Duo was breathing quickly. With one last heated glance at the body laying sprawled on the bed of the cheap motel room, Duo straightened his clothes and walked away.  
  
Oh no, his partner wouldn't be doing much at all after that.  
  
  
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With these hungry eyes   
One look at you and I can't disguise   
I've got hungry eyes   
I feel the magic between you and I   
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Duo frowned, catching Heero's chin in his hand and tilting the Japanese boy's face so that his violet eyes could focus on the darkening bruise. "Shit, Heero. Did I do that to you?"  
  
Heero scowled, breaking free of Duo's grip. "It's nothing."  
  
"Nothing! Dammit, Heero! You need to *tell* me when I do stuff like that! I don't want to hurt you!"  
  
"I'm fine. It's nothing I can't handle." And before Duo could cut in again, Heero grabbed Duo's face forcefully and pressed a hard kiss against the American's lips. When they finally broke off, panting and aroused, Heero smirked. "It's nothing that I didn't enjoy."  
  
  
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I wanna hold you so hear me out   
I wanna show you what love's all about   
Darlin' tonight   
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Was this love?  
  
Was what he did on those dark and empty nights, love? He told himself that it was. It wasn't anything that wasn't asked for. It wasn't anything that wasn't needed or expected or, sometimes, even begged for. Duo cast a sidelong glance at Heero, seeing the Japanese pilot bent dutifully over his textbook. What did Heero think about this? Did the other boy question himself like this? Did he feel the need, the burn, the desire the way Duo did?  
  
Did he want this? Yes. He enjoyed it. He could feel the thrill in his veins even at this moment. He wanted to do it again. And again. And again. Even the memories of it were never good enough for him. But he couldn't. He couldn't keep doing this. Two more times. He'd only do this two more times. Then he had to stop.  
  
He cast another glance at Heero from the corner of his violet eyes, feeling his heart swelling in his chest, then bursting when Heero turned his head and the full extent of his bruise on his face was bared to the light of day.  
  
Was this love?  
  
Duo felt slightly sick to his stomach.  
  
He had to do it again tonight.  
  
  
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Now I've got you in my sights   
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"You want this. You want this. That's right. Beg for it. Beg for it and maybe I'll give you your release. No? You're not going to beg? Don't you want it? Don't you want this? I know you do. Just say it. Say it. Beg me. Do it. Beg for it. Bitch. Say it! Say it! You want this! Beg me for it!"  
  
"OH GOD! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!"  
  
Duo thrust one last time, a hard swift stroke that sent ripples of pleasure jolting through his own body.  
  
A gasping whimper. A shudder. Then stillness.  
  
"See...?" Duo said as he withdrew, panting roughly, wiping the back of his hand against his forehead, "All you had to do was ask."  
  
  
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With these hungry eyes   
One look at you and I can't disguise   
I've got hungry eyes   
I feel the magic between you and I   
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Duo couldn't look Heero in the eyes the next morning.  
  
Duo couldn't help the feelings that swelled in his chest as he felt the Japanese's boy's eyes on him the whole day.  
  
This was the last night. The last time. The last everything.  
  
  
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I've got hungry eyes   
Now I've got you in my sights   
With those hungry eyes   
Now did I take you by surprise   
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The setup was always the same, no matter how it made Duo feel.   
  
Always some crowded public place where he picked out his prey. Invitation sent. Invitation received. All that awaited was the consummation of the act. But this night was different somehow, Duo could feel that knowledge singing through his veins, humming in his blood, pulsing through his mind even better than the enjoyment he took. Maybe he was keyed up because this would be the last time. Part of him sorrowed that he would never do this again; another rejoiced that he would soon be finished. Clean. Free. Alive.  
  
Duo pushed through the fire escape door and into the alleyway. The club he had been in was certainly not up to regulation, as no blaring alarm or flash of lights accompanied him. He pasted a small smirk across his face, which widened when he saw his prey still walking towards the front of the club. With no further thought, Duo dashed forward, taking after his namesake as he slid through the shadows. His prey was almost at the street, almost within the safe glow of the lights and nightlife. He pressed himself harder, and with one quick movement, reached out and caught the shoulder of the man.  
  
He whirled his target around, a savage smile on his lips. He caught surprised blue eyes for a split-second before his right arm delivered a hard blow into his prey's stomach. Duo admired the way the lamplight flickered over his brass knuckles as he removed his fist from the man's chest, and the man tumbled to the ground, wheezing and coughing.  
  
Duo grinned at the man curled into a ball in the dirty alley. "Oh, I'm sorry. Did I catch you by surprise?"  
  
  
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I need you to see   
This love was meant to be   
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"Wh-who...?" the man managed to gasp out.  
  
Duo frowned. "You should know who I am."  
  
"No... I... don't know... this isn't..."  
  
Duo drew his leg back and kicked the fallen man sharply in the ribs. The sound of a satisfying 'snap' beneath his foot and the choked gasp that accompanied it brought the smile back to Duo's face. "You just don't get it. This was meant to be."  
  
He didn't let up, releasing a torrent of kicks and punches on the trembling man, not giving him a moment's opportunity to either flee or fight. There were voices singing in Duo's head, dictating all of his actions. But before he could get caught up in that rush, Duo tamped it down, stepping back for a moment to smile at the man again.  
  
"I've spent eight years tracking all of you down. What, not keeping track of all your old buddies? It's okay. They're all dead now. I did it. Did you really think that you would get away?"  
  
Duo reached down, grabbing the man by the collar and hauling him up. The man dangled in his grip, too hurt and scared to do more than keep his wide blue eyes focused on Duo's glittering violet orbs. The American leaned in closer, smelling the blood and fear pouring off his prey and letting the heady feeling rush through his veins again. "You see, you're the last one. The last one I need to be free. The last one I need so that I don't feel like this anymore."  
  
  
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I've got hungry eyes   
One look at you and I can't disguise   
I've got hungry eyes   
I feel the magic between you and I   
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In his head, sometimes, he could still hear the sounds.   
  
Not screaming. Thank god it was never screaming. He had returned to the church far too late to be there for the screaming. But in some ways, the whimpering was worse. He could hear everything clearly, the slow crackle of dying fires, the choking sobs and broken whispers of people who did not want to die. And *her* voice. Oh god... he could always hear her voice. He could see the happiness in her eyes shining through the pain as she looked at him. She had been glad that he had been unhurt. He'd rather have died if it would spare her pain. And then she said that she loved him, that he should continue to live and put the past behind him. But he never could. He could always hear her voice and feel her body in his arms and see the life drain out of her and cover him in a shroud of red.  
  
And his whole life had been turned upside down because it was *her* body cradled in his arms, instead of the other way around. It was he that was crying for the pain she felt, instead of the other way around. It was he that was unable to understand why life would do this to her. Through the pitch-black night, only illuminated by the dying embers of what had once been a haven, he had lost it all again.  
  
There *was* one scream he remembered from that night.  
  
It was his own.   
  
  
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I've got hungry eyes   
Now I've got you in my sights   
With those hungry eyes   
Now did I take you by surprise   
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The American tossed the man away from him easily, as if he was no more than that day's garbage. The words still came from his lips. Part of the routine. Part of what he did. Part of the penance that he was trying to achieve. "And you know what? That last thing you're gonna see is me. Me, laughing at you the way you laughed eight years ago. Do you remember? Do you remember now?"  
  
There was a flash of recognition in the man's eyes. A horrified remembrance of the words that spilled from Duo's lips. "Ei-eight years... the... the church...!"  
  
Duo was actually pleased that the man remembered. Only half of the others did. That not remembering had made their fates worse. "That's right. Maxwell Church. Guess what? You created me on that day, so really, your death is all your fault."  
  
"No... please! Anything you want...!"  
  
The man had given up on any pretenses of keeping his pride. Instead, he cried and begged and pleaded shamelessly, trying to use anything he could to sway Duo's resolve. But they always did that, all of them, it was part of the routine, pat of the game, and Duo had played for far too long to stop now. His voice took a hard edge to it, and he reached down again, shaking the man in his bloodstained hands.  
  
"Isn't that what Father said? Didn't he beg you to leave? Tell me!"  
  
The man realized that he had made a mistake, but he couldn't rally against the force of Shinigami's will. "Y-yes..."  
  
Duo's hands found their way to certain breaks in the man's arm. He pulled at the flesh mercilessly, ignoring the man's scream of pain. When he dropped his prey again, the man was shuddering and shivering; his face pale even in the dull-yellow light of the lamps.  
  
"And what did he say?"   
  
Duo's blade was in his hands. He didn't quite recall how it got there.  
  
"... he... he... said that the place... house of God... shouldn't... shouldn't... oh god! Please stop!"  
  
"That it was a house of God and shouldn't be violated? That's right. But you did anyway."  
  
"S-sorry! I'm sorry! I--"  
  
"It's too late for you. And it's too late for me. I'll see you in Hell."  
  
But Hell didn't come soon enough for the man, the beaten sobbing, shaking wreck of pathetic human being curled up on the ground. The pounding pulse of music from the club was still echoing through the alley. Underneath it was the muted sounds of many voices talking at the same time. All around were people, so many people, and not one could help this man. Duo thought that the irony was beautiful.  
  
"Do you want this?" Duo asked, his voice low and gruff as he raised his bloody knife to the man's teary, frightened eyes. "Do you want this? I can end it now. I can give you what you want. Beg me. Beg me for it. Ask for my forgiveness and maybe I'll let you die."  
  
"P... p-please..."  
  
"'Please,' what?"  
  
"... p-please... kill me..."  
  
There was a flash of metal, the glint of shine reflecting from the sputtering light of the street lamp overhead. The shine disappeared behind a film of red with a quick slash that brought a gurgling, choking noise to echo through the dirty alley. Duo looked down at the man crumpled on the ground, choking on his own life, drowning in his own blood. His breath was harsh in his throat. He stared down at the knife in his hand and started to laugh so hard that tears ran down his face. Why did the things that felt so good also hurt so much? Or was it the other way around? Duo looked up into the dismal night sky and took a deep breath, panting harshly in ecstasy and bliss.  
  
"I love you, Sister Helen. Father Maxwell. I love you all!"  
  
It started to rain.  
  
  
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With my hungry eyes   
I need...   
Hungry eyes   
Now I've got you in my sights   
With my hungry eyes  
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"Where have you been, Duo?"  
  
Duo looked up, startled by Heero's voice cutting through the dark. Rainwater dripped from his sodden bangs and equally wet clothing. He was probably leaving puddles on the floor. He pushed his hands into the pockets of his pants, feeling the telltale hardness and slight sticky moisture of the secret within. He removed his hands from his pockets and looked at them.   
  
They were clean.  
  
Duo smiled widely, wrapping his arms around Heero's waist and pressing a kiss against his lover's bare shoulder. "Just tying up some loose ends, Heero. So, is dinner ready? I'm hungry."  
  
  
  
  
  
-- Owari -- 


End file.
